‘I Lost 125 Pounds And Now I’m A Bodybuilder’
Growing up, kids bullied me about my weight, so by the time I hit high school, I was ready for a change.
I started cycling through diets like crazy—specifically ones that promised fast weight-loss results. I shelled out more money than I’d like to admit on gym memberships, diet plans, and supplements. But every time, I’d lose 15 to 20 pounds, then gain it all back (plus more). I felt trapped in this cycle of hating my body, dieting, bingeing, and feeling ashamed.
Then, when I was 24, I had my daughter. She was perfect in every way, but I was spiraling. I felt worse than ever about myself, inside and out. Postpartum depression hit me hard, and I found myself falling deeper into a dark place. I turned to food.
My daughter was just learning to love her body, and I didn’t know what that felt like.
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“transformation isn’t sweet and bright. it’s a dark and murky, painful pushing. an unraveling of the untruths you’ve carried in your body. a practice in facing your own created demons. complete uprooting before becoming.” – erickson
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By the time my daughter was three years old, my depression was at its worst and I hit my heaviest weight at 281 pounds. Just as she was discovering the joy of running, jumping, and twirling, I was losing my inability to play with her in the most basic of ways. I felt like I was watching the world from behind a dirty window.
I met with my doctor and made a plan to regain my health. My mental health came first. I found an awesome therapist and got treated for my depression and anxiety. Once I began to escape that dark cloud, I saw how my mental illness and my weight were caught in a vicious cycle.
Once I was in a good place mentally, it was time to take control of my physical health. My doctor and I decided the best route was gastric bypass surgery, which I had on February 7, 2018.
Surgery changed my entire life, including my diet.
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So I’m gonna be real with y’all here for a minute. I’ve hit a stall. The longest stall I’ve had since surgery. I’ve been sitting at 157 for TWO MONTHS. My eating has been clean, my workouts have been killer and my body is just like, nope. Sorry sister. Better luck next time. – The old me would have gotten aggravated and given up. I would have become “content” with where I am and would have settled for mediocre but I know the goal I have set out in my mind. I know that I am capable of so much more. I know that if I take a step back reevaluate what I am doing and what changes I might need to make in order to get me to where I want to be, I can get to that goal. – I refuse to settle for less than I deserve. I have come too far and worked too hard to just be content in where I am. – So here’s to us friends. Let’s keep pushing forward and working hard. Let’s not settle for being mediocre and content. Let’s crush the hell out of our goals and be the badasses I know we’re all capable to being 😎🤘🏼
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The surgery itself has very strict rules for what you can eat and how much, but many people find a way to eat junk food and end up regaining their weight despite their smaller stomachs. I’m determined not to let that happen to me!
Step one in forming a new relationship with food was revamping my kitchen. Gone are all the processed comfort foods like chips, cookies, and soda. Now, I eat lean meats (mainly fish and chicken) with lots of veggies and fresh fruits. I also started cooking, which helps me create healthy versions of the foods that I crave.
Here’s what I typically eat in a day:
I revamped my exercise habits.
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If you stay determined, the obstacles cannot stop your progress. You will triumph over every mountain. Don’t give up!
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Hiring a personal trainer was the best decision I ever made. I started with workouts geared to my fitness level (which, at the beginning was basically zilch), courtesy of my coach, Brooklyn Taylor.
As I gained strength, she upped the intensity and movements to keep my body guessing and progressing. Now, I warm up with 15 minutes of light cardio on the treadmill or elliptical, then I lift for an hour. Brooklyn changes my routine so I never get bored.
When I first started, I was using the smallest weights on the rack, lifting just five pounds for lots (and lots!) of reps. Now, I go straight for the heavy weights, and I’m so proud of my strength gains.
My first 5K race was a really, really big deal.
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Happy #transformationtuesday! Do y’all get tired of side by sides? Cause I sure don’t and it honestly keeps me motivated to keep pushing forward to meet my next goal. I can remember taking the photo on the left and actually feeling “skinny.” I was about a month post-op and down 40lbs. The shirt I was wearing was actually loose and when I bought it, it was too small. I was proud of myself then but I’m even more proud of myself now. Let’s keep on keepin’ on! 😎👊🏼
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This past Thanksgiving, I ran my first 5K—ever. The girl who couldn’t even finish the mile run in middle school finished her first 5K race in 36 minutes and 48 seconds (and I didn’t stop once!). It was one of the proudest moments of my life.
Today, I’m maintaining my weight loss at a powerful 155 pounds and I never felt better, inside and out. Now that I’ve lost weight and have a handle on my depression, I feel like I can finally enjoy life.
I love showing my progress off on Instagram (follow me @k.adkinss!) and I’ve made a lot of great friends through social media. It’s also made me better at my job, working as a licensed practical nurse. Oh and you may be seeing more of me—I just signed up to compete in my first NPC bikini bodybuilding competition this year. Bring on the sparkly bikinis!
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